The best communication advice I have to offer to myself and anyone who asks me what to do to end a stressful verbal conflict is to take the time to look at a situation from another person’s perspective.
I wrote about this in another blog posting titled The Turnaround Technique. Then recently I read in The Art of Happiness the fundamental beliefs The Dalai Lama uses to help him be an excellent communicator. I believe they are worth mentioning here.
The Dalai Lama beliefs (posted on page 192 of the Tenth Anniversary Edition of The Art of Happiness) are as follows:
“One: I am a human being
Two: I want to be happy and I don’t want to suffer
Three: Other human beings, like myself, also want to be happy and don’t want to suffer.”
The Dalai Lama’s belief reminds me that when we enter into direct communication with someone we all want to remain happy and not suffer in the interaction. The goal is always a Win Win situation.
The concept of Win Win was written about Dr. Stephen R. Covey in his best selling book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Think Win Win is the Fourth Habit. If you have not read this book or if you have not read it for a long time get a copy and you will enjoy the paradigm shifting ideas Dr. Covey presented. His ideas are still changing people’s lives today.
I also recommend again you checking out The Art of Happiness.
These books can help change lives for the better.
Enjoy a wonderful stress free day.
David
